


"Get Ready, Get Set, Don't Go..."

by LaKoda0518



Series: Where Words Fail, Music Speaks [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Bittersweet, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Father-Daughter Relationship, Fatherhood, Fluff, Gen, Growing Up, John Watson is a Good Parent, John is a Bit Not Good, M/M, Moving Out, Parent-Child Relationship, Parenthood, Song Lyrics, Teen Rosamund Mary "Rosie" Watson, Two Fathers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:07:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaKoda0518/pseuds/LaKoda0518
Summary: Rosie's off to college and John struggles to stay strong.
Relationships: John Watson & Rosamund Mary "Rosie" Watson, Sherlock Holmes & John Watson & Rosamund Mary "Rosie" Watson
Series: Where Words Fail, Music Speaks [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1160186
Comments: 7
Kudos: 24





	"Get Ready, Get Set, Don't Go..."

**Author's Note:**

> Patreon Poll Fic #2!!! I asked, my patrons voted! Parentlock fluffy(-ish) song fic it is 😍 I hope you all enjoy it! I heard this song on my daughter's tablet and I had to sit down and write this out so it's definitely a work of heart!! 🥰
> 
> Special thanks to WritingOutLoud for reading it through and letting me know it was okay to post!! 😘
> 
> Song: "Ready, Set, Don't Go"  
> Artist: Billy Ray and Miley Cyrus

John stands stock still, staring down at the bright pink luggage on the stairs. It seems like only yesterday he'd brought his perfect little girl home from the hospital, terrified in ways he'd never thought possible until he'd become a father. Back then, he'd wondered how on earth he was supposed to protect something so small and he'd wondered even more how on earth he was ever supposed to be everything she needed him to be. 

Today, he finds himself face to face with something he hadn't realised he'd been dreading. The bags are packed, the car is filled with petrol, and Rosie is full of excitement… even if it means leaving John - and the room upstairs - heartbreakingly empty.

  
  


_ She's gotta do what she's gotta do _

_ And I've gotta like it or not _

_ She's got dreams too big for this town _

_ And she needs to give 'em a shot _

_ Whatever they are _

_ - _

"Well, I think that's everything. Petrol, luggage, computer, books, schedule…" Rosie chews her lip, wracking her brain for anything she may have missed. Sherlock has been hounding her all morning in order to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything that she could possibly need.

"Microscope? Petri dishes? What about the fungus collection we catologued last summer?" 

A bark of laughter escapes her but she shakes her head affectionately. "Papa, I won't even have room for all of that stuff in my room! I'll have flatmates too, you know," she answers with a smile. As chaotic as it is, she's going to miss everything about her life here: the crime scenes, the case files, the mountains and mountains of Chinese takeout containers. Nothing is ever going to be the same but she can't deny that she's eager to see what the future holds.

  
  


_ Looks like I'm all ready to leave _

_ Nothing left to pack _

_ - _

John sucks in a deep breath before shouldering the two cases and making his way out the front door. For a moment, his heart nearly stops as he takes in the sight before him. Every inch of the little sedan's interior is loaded down with books, bedding, pillows, a rug, towels, toiletries, even the oversized stuffed dog that John had given her for her fifth birthday is buckled safe and sound into the passenger seat - her trusty navigator in more ways than one…

"Can you pop those into the boot for me, Daddy?" Rosie asks, gesturing to the luggage cheerily, and it's the joy in her voice that finally shatters the silence.

Clearing his throat, John nods and plasters a tight smile on his face before dong just as she asks. As much as he'd like to call it bravery, he knows it's more like the mark of a coward. Nothing scares him more than watching his little girl outgrow her need for him overnight and he knows he could never admit it - not to her, not to anyone. 

He glances down at the cases one last time. They seem to glare back at him in pity, symbolic imagery of the other half of his heart being loaded into the boot of his daughter's car, leaving behind a gaping hole in his chest. The sadness that envelops him threatens to shake him to his core but he closes his eyes in an attempt to steady himself.

_ There ain't no room for me in that car _

_ Even if she asked me to tag along _

_ - _

"Everything okay, Daddy?"

Rosie's voice breaks through his thoughts once again and John closes the boot a bit quicker than he'd have liked. "Of course! Why wouldn't it be?" He turns to face her, putting on his best 'Proud Father' face and their eyes meet for what feels like the first and last time all at once. For a split second, John thinks he sees a hint of uncertainty reflected back at him but he brushes it away. She needs him to let go…

-

Rosie's smile threatens to falter but she's learned by now she can't let it show. She can see the fear etched deep in her father's eyes no matter how hard he's trying to hide it and something tugs at her heart. He's not good at these things - he never has been - so she doesn't intend to force him to be now. He needs her to be brave… 

-

_ God I gotta be strong _

-

Ten minutes. 

Six hundred little seconds ticking by. It's all that stands between the only life Rosie has ever known and the future she hopes is just as exciting. As she glances down at her phone, she does a quick scan of her emails one last time. Her scholarship packet has been downloaded as a PDF file and directions to the admissions office are saved in the folder for important information just as her papa said they would be. 

There's a container full of biscuits and a thermos of tea from her father snuggled safely into the centre console and the thought of tucking into it later fills her heart with joy. Between the two of them, she knows her fathers have done all they can to make the drive comfortable, but something still just doesn't feel right.

_ I'm at the starting line of the rest of my life _

_ As ready as I've ever been _

_ Got the hunger and the stars in my eyes _

_ The prize is mine to win _

_ - _

John's throat seems to swell as his eyes fall on his daughter once again. He wasn't wrong about the hesitation - he should have expected it really. Her smile shines with the light of a thousand suns but her eyes… Her eyes take him back so very quickly.

She's six again, standing outside the door to her first primary school as she hides behind his legs - terrified to go without him. He's late to work for an entire week straight and it's the greatest feeling in the world.

He blinks and the school is calling. A trip to the chemist is in order and he's thankful he's a doctor but even still the whole situation is mortifying. The wide variety of feminine hygiene products in front of him feels like nothing in comparison to the lion's den of awkward conversation looming over him. It's then that he wishes like crazy that her mother was still alive as he glances sideways at his not-so-little girl, looking down as she hides her face in embarrassment all while keeping her arms folded protectively over the knot where John's jacket is tied around her waist. 

He blinks once again and he's sat on the edge of the pink, fluffy bed upstairs. All his experience with locked room murders and crime scene investigations fills his mind with numerous ideas for how to dispose of a dead body as he holds his sweet little girl in his arms. She cries, he comforts; she hurts, he dies inside. He hadn't anticipated the fact that her first broken heart would break his too.

_ She's waiting on my blessings _

_ Before she hits that open road _

_ Baby, get ready _

_ - _

A hug for her papa leads to an extra special kiss to her forehead and Rosie lets out a soft laugh at the comical little smacking sound. Although feelings have always been a difficult subject in her household, she has never ever been short on affection. Goodbye hugs and kisses have always been important and, deep down, she knows these may very well be the most important ones of all.

_ Oh I'm ready _

_ - _

'I don't think I can do it…'

'You don't have much choice, I'm afraid,' Mary answers, grimly. She's a figment of John's imagination, an imaginary coping mechanism residing deep within his subconscious, but she's there all the same.

'How did I let this sneak up on me so quickly?' he asks, ignoring Mary's previous statement. 'Im a soldier for fuck's sake…'

The ghost of his wife's laughter echoes in his head and it chills him to the bone. He tries not to think too much into the fact that he's literally disappearing into his own head as her voice answers loud and clear in the empty space. 'What's that got to do with anything? You were a soldier and you still didn't see His Nibs coming, did you?'

John frowns but can't help shrugging; she always seemed to rub his feelings for Sherlock in his face every chance she got. 'That was different. This is my own bloody daughter.'

He glances up at Mary then and she's just as he remembered her. Her blonde hair is styled just as it always was and she's wearing a navy blue button down with a pair of dark trousers and a gentle yet devious smile. 'All the more reason to hide from your deepest, darkest fears, John…'

_ Get set _

_ Don't go _

_ - _

Sherlock taps on the keypad of the sat nav screen in the front of the car, rattling off the latest information he's read about the university she's going to be attending but Rosie barely hears a word. Her heart is pounding with excitement and she can barely keep still. "I know, I know," she chuckles, tugging Sherlock by the arm in an attempt to dislodge him from the open window of her car. "The science building is located in the university centre and I promise to send pictures as soon as I get there."

  
  


_ Looks like things are falling in place _

_ - _

Conversation concerning the labs and equipment Rosie will have access to fades away behind the roaring silence threatening to split John's head wide-open. He feels the ache in his chest and he fights it. He can't let himself fall apart. Not yet, not in front of her. 

  
  


_ Feels like they're falling apart _

_ I painted this big ol' smile on my face _

_ To hide my broken heart _

_ If only she knew _

_ - _

Rosie's fighting the urge to giggle as her papa is criticising the quality of university lab equipment compared to his own personal preferences but one glance at her father melts the grin right off of her face. His cookie-cutter smile fails to hide the glazed over veil of heartache in his eyes and she feels a lump form in her throat. What would he say if she told him it was okay to break? If she told him that the thought of going off on her own was exciting, but the thought of leaving him behind was almost more than she could bear? What if he knew she was scared?

_ This is where you don't say what you want so bad to say _

_ - _

Rosie's looking at him now and John straightens himself up a bit before squaring his shoulders. Stiff upper lip… That's the English way. It always has been. He can see the need for guidance, the need for approval in the blue of his daughter's eyes and he knows that he can't give anything away. If she knew how badly he was hurting, he didn't know what she would do…

Would she be upset with him for being selfish on the most important day of her life? Or… would she be relieved that he wants her to stay? Maybe, she would even reconsider leaving if he just - No… He can't take this away from her. He can't let her down, now.

_ This is where I want to but I won't get in the way _

_ Of her and her dreams _

_ And spreading her wings _

_ - _

Her arms are around his neck before she can stop herself. With all the courage she can muster, she fights back a wave of tears as they seek to drown her in all the emotions she's trying to bury but she won't let him down. Her father's arms tighten around her waist and it isn't until then that she realizes that she's almost managed to catch him up in height. 

'When did that happen?' she thinks to herself and it's then that she realizes all the things she may have missed along the way, all the things she missed while she was too busy growing up. The thought scares her a bit but she can't hold onto it; she can't think back like that, not until she's alone. 

_ (I'm ready to fly) _

_ I'm at the starting line of the rest of my life _

_ As ready as I've ever been _

_ Got the hunger and the stars in my eyes _

_ The prize is mine to win _

_ - _

John closes his eyes as Rosie's soft blonde hair brushes his face and he fights the urge to bury his face in it. He breathes her in as discreetly as he can, memorising the smell of her shampoo and the warmth of 221B still evident on the collar of her coat. When he sees her again, the smell of home will be replaced with something completely foreign to him and he's not sure why that bothers him but it does. 

Everything is changing so much faster than he ever thought it would and he feels his arms tighten around her before he can stop himself. If he could just hold onto this moment, if he could just freeze time and stay here for the rest of his life, he probably would. It's not fair to Rosie, not in the slightest, but every parent is allowed one selfish moment in their life right?

Even if that is the case, John probably used that up a long time ago… 

'Don't dwell on that, now… you'll regret it later…' Mary's voice echoes in his ear once again and he feels a hand on his shoulder. Whether it's Sherlock's or Mary's, he tries not to think too much of it.

_ She's waiting on my blessings _

_ Before she hits that open road _

_ Baby get ready _

_ Get set _

_ Don't go _

_ - _

A kiss to her hair gives her pause and, for a moment, Rosie thinks back to all the kisses he's ever given her before. She can't remember all of them but something in the back of her mind tells her she better start now. His hair is mostly grey now, much greyer than she'd noticed before and the lines around his eyes seem a lot deeper as well. The evidence of his aging doesn't scare her as much as she thought but she knows it's only because of Sherlock.

With her papa there to look after him, she knows he'll be okay. They're getting to the end of their crime solving days and it's hard to imagine them doing anything else with their lives but she figures they'll find something. Maybe they'll even retire and move to the countryside? It might be nice to spend summers and holidays somewhere new but it's even harder to think of them living anywhere other than London.

"You're sure you've got everything?" John asks, his voice a bit raw in her ear.

Rosie lets out a soft chuckle and nods against his cheek, the scratch of his stubble a welcome comfort. "I'm positive. You know Papa has double, triple, and probably even quadruple checked every single thing we've managed to shove into the car so I don't think there's too much to worry about."

She doesn't tell him that she wishes he were going with her...

_ I'm at the starting line of the rest of my life _

_ As ready as I ever been (I'll be alright) _

_ Got the hunger and the stars in my eyes _

_ The prize is mine to win (I'll be okay) _

_ - _

"Drive safe and call us when you get there, all right? Don't text and drive, don't fiddle with the radio too much, and just pay attention to the -"

"Daddy…" Rosie's voice is patient and kind when she cuts him off, but, even though it's gentle, it's a reprimand nonetheless. He's running out of time… Eighteen years turned to ten minutes in the blink of an eye and now those last ten minutes have dwindled down to mere seconds. 

Her navy blue eyes scan his but he dips his head just slightly so she doesn't see the hurt in them. He's so close to getting this right that he can't bear the thought of messing it up now. "I know… just… be careful, yeah?" 

He doesn't ask her to stay and he doesn't tell her how tight his chest is or how badly his heart is breaking.

_ She's waiting on my blessings _

_ Before she hits that open road _

_ Baby get ready _

_ Get set _

_ Please don't go _

_ - _

John and Sherlock stand on the pavement, waving as the car starts down the road. So much has been left unsaid but John knows it's for the better. No matter how badly it hurts, no matter how deep the ache in his heart is, he couldn't guilt trip her and he certainly didn't want her to worry. Keeping his thoughts to himself was the best gift he could have given her and he's at least proud that he's managed to get this right.

Sherlock's fingertips brush his freehand where it rests by his side and John feels the ache in his heart subside just a bit as Sherlock's fingers slot effortlessly between his own. He's going to miss Rosie like mad but at least he can take comfort in the fact that he'll always have the detective by his side.

"You were very brave, today," Sherlock whispers in the silence, his deep baritone sending a rush of warmth through John's chest. "I wasn't sure if you were going to be able to keep it together."

"Neither was I…" he admits, swallowing thickly as he continues to wave. He keeps his eyes locked on the rear window of the car where he can just make out the back of his daughter's head. "But, I couldn't let her down."

Sherlock lets out a light snort of amusement, tightening his grip on John's hand before stroking the back of his knuckles with the pad of his thumb. "You've never let her down a day in your life, John."

The lump in John's throat swells more than he wanted it to and a quiet hum is all he can manage in reply as he tries to swallow it down. He isn't sure how true that statement is but he's grateful for the kindness anyway.

'He's right, you know,' Mary says, standing beside him where only he can see. 'I knew that I couldn't be what she needed… but I knew that you could. You're a good man, John Watson… and a good father too…'

Before John can react to the apparition at his side, the deep glow of taillights catches his eye and the car comes to a stop at the end of the road. When she makes this turn, she's gone and the rest of their lives will never be the same. Yes, she'll always be his daughter but making that turn feels a lot like the final nail in the coffin.

The car sits still for what feels like forever and, for a moment, John even begins to wonder if something might be wrong. Until the driver side door swings open...

-

Rosie's feet hit the pavement hard and fast, sending her barreling back toward 221B. The sight of all she loved tucked neatly into her rearview mirror like a distant memory had weighed heavily on her heart and she knew she couldn't leave it like this. She couldn't leave her father behind without saying everything she'd always needed to say but never knew how until now.

A look of utter confusion sweeps over John's face but she dives for him without any explanation. Her arms wrap tightly around his neck once again and she buries her face in the warmth and safety of the old woolen jumper he's wearing. No matter where she goes or how far she travels, her father's arms will always be home and she hopes like Hell that he knows it.

"Rosie? What's -?"

"I love you, Daddy…" she whispers, nuzzling into the space between his neck and shoulder; her lips tremble as she says the words and everything she wanted to say dies in her throat. The smell of his cologne is always strongest here even if she's never understood why.

His arms fall around her in the tightest hug she thinks he's ever given her and she can almost feel his heart break even if he's still fighting back the feeling. "I… I love you, too, sweetheart… God, Rosie, I love you, too…"

A half-sob, half-giggle bubbles up from her chest and kisses the edge of his stubbled jaw, not caring if anyone sees the silent tears trickling down her cheeks. "I know… I just couldn't leave without saying it," she answers, wiping furiously at one eye with the edge of her sleeve. "It's just… I'll miss you… I'll miss you both so much it hurts… but I'll be back, I promise."

The words seem to dislodge something deep in her father's chest and tears fill his eyes - a sight Rosie doesn't think she's ever seen in her entire life. "I'll miss you too, kiddo… more than you will ever know." 

He's not good at these things and he isn't pretending to be, but, when he continues, she can't help but feel grateful for the sudden courage that seems to have taken over him.

"It's going to be tough… but… I'm proud of you. I'm so so proud of you… Your papa's proud of you, Uncle Greg and Aunt Molly are proud of you, and…" he swallows thickly, closing his eyes for a moment as if he's thinking out exactly what he wants to say next. "I know Mrs. Hudson would be proud of you… and your mother would be proud of you, too… We… We didn't have the best foundation for a marriage but she did love you… and she'd want you to know how brilliantly clever and special you are…"

The words seem to choke him up a bit and before he can crumble too badly, Rosie wraps him up in yet another tight hug. She strokes the back of his hair and kisses his cheek as her heart fills with more love than she's ever felt before. "I know… I know she would… and it's all because of you…"

John's shoulders give a slight shudder as he buries his face in the collar of her coat. From the open door of her car, Rosie can hear the distant ringing of her mobile phone and she knows she's running late. She should've left ages ago but this… this is more important. Her father has taken care of her twenty four hours a day, seven days a week for the last eighteen years of their lives… She can spare an extra hour of hers to take care of him...

_ Don't go _

_ Let me go now right now _

_ Don't go _

_ I'll be alright, I'll be okay _

_ Know that I'll be thinking of you each and everyday _

_ She's gotta do what she's gotta do _

_ Let me go now _

_ She's gotta do what she's gotta do _

_ Oh I've gotta do what I've gotta do _

_ She's gotta do what she's gotta do _

_ Don't go _


End file.
